Monday, February 6, 2012

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

     Okay baby, let's do this thing! At 39 weeks pregnant I am ready for Labor, Motherhood and for my world to be Rocked by my new little man. I have my weekly OB appointments on Friday mornings and sadly these have been creating pretty crappy Fridays for me. I have been 1cm dilated for three weeks now and am having a love hate relationship with my cervix. I am feeling the pressure to go into labor not only from the cramping and contractions that I am experiencing but from some of those around me. I know that I must not let the expectations of others effect me but this is really hard when I want the same thing that they do, for the baby to be here! 
      I am a bit of a worrier and maybe even could be classified as a control freak.  I must say that this experience has been nerve racking and humbling at the same time. There is so much going on in there and thankfully the pregnancy has been pretty smooth. I have been  lucky to have an amazing support system; my husband who tells me daily how beautiful and great I look despite the extra pounds I'm packing, my family and friends who calm my worries and give sweet words of encouragement, and my fabulous doctor whose knowledge and confidence empowers me!
     This experience has taught me that although I can control what goes into my body, the amount of activity and rest I get, and how I decorate and organize the baby nursery; I cannot control the time of arrival of my sweet baby boy. My excitement and love for this baby is CRAZY! So this week as I continue sitting, waiting and wishing I decide to enjoy my last few moments on my own, with my husband and relax by thinking positive thoughts and practicing patience!


Tuesday, December 20, 2011

New Life be the judge?

As I was sweeping up the Christmas tree needles for the fourth time in 24 hours this morning and complaining while doing so to my sister (and best friend/confidant) she made an comment ....she said, "Your nagging and need to control is on the verge of Kate Gosselin's Style..." WHAT!?
Here's the back story....
Last night my brother and his family came over to celebrate Christmas. I had spent the day cleaning the house and preparing dinner. My sister and my husband arrived at about the same time. She and I started right in prepping dinner and running around the kitchen. I put out the appetizers for the rest of the family set to arrive any moment. My husband, who just had a 12 hour work day, was starving and began chowing down on the appetizers. I barked at him to wait and that those were for when everyone arrived. I then asked him to do 17 other things around the house, shouting as he was doing them incorrectly. I then cursed a few mixing bowls and snapped at my sister. When I think about it my nagging continued throughout the night. I am a Negative Nagging Nancy and have a real problem!
Is it so? Am I similar to the joyous Kate Gosselin? In review of the evenings' happenings it appears that I am...
So here it is, my first New Years resolution ...Work on my Gosh Darn Nagging, bite my tough more often and overall work on being more pleasant...because there is little worse than this monstrous sight!

Monday, December 19, 2011

A new adventure

I sit here at the cusp of many great life transitions. Motherhood is just around the corner for me…eight weeks to be exact and I am well aware of the changes my life faces. My husband and I are having a baby boy, Tristan Nicholas, and are so excited to meet him. We are preparing for his arrival by decorating his room, organizing our lives and enjoying our last quiet evenings as a couple. As our first child I hope that you as a reader can keep up with our sweet little family, receive some comic relief, and hopefully give us some words of wisdom.
I have also just temporarily closed a chapter of my life, my education. Surprisingly this has been significantly more meaningful than I once thought.  I am currently half way completed with my graduate school program in school psychology. I have pressed the pause button to give birth to and to care for my sweet baby boy. Don’t get me wrong motherhood excites me to no end, those of you that know me are well aware that this has been a lifelong dream and desire, but my identity as a student is deeply ingrained. I had a very successful past semester and made amazing discoveries in my future career. I have to admit that a few tears were shed upon leaving my schooling. (Those who know me also know that I am a major weeper and that I wear my emotions on my sleeve (pregnant or not!)
 If that isn’t enough I am also a very pleased newlywed, almost 5 months of marital bliss with my adorable husband. Although my life changes mean everything to me and are all I ever wanted I have realized that as they are upon me, they are a bit more than what I expected. Some of these life goals were not executed as planned but definitely have changed my life for the better and caused me to have an immense amount of gratitude for my family’s blessings. (After almost a year of fabulous wedding planning those two little lines showed up on a non-school related test 2 months before the big day, thank god morning sickness prevented weight gain!)
And also I'm stepping foot into this new world of blogging. So as my first post I want to give insight on what this blog is all about and warn/inform you that I may be overly honest, raw and too open for some. But HEY, this is my crazy beautiful hectic life and I am over the moon happy and excited for all that awaits me!